Helpless
by waterflower63
Summary: She saw her brothers body, and she knew who murdered him, but was forced to carry on with life. Suffering from Anorexia, she stumbles upon a not so welcoming group of nine. Will she learn her place or will she steal her way out of this strange group. She may forever be considered more trouble than she is worth?
1. Chapter 1

**Ok so I posted this story up once before and got rid of it because I did not really like it but I'm going to start this story again and see how it goes. Any advice/ reviews would be great.**

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**Chapter one: **

Run, that was all I could think of doing, I ripped through the trees panting lightly. Sweat pored over my body; my blonde hair falling out the loose pony tail, my green eye's stinging with tears. I ran to a stop grasping my knees as bile rose up in my dry mouth,

"Oh no not again," I splatted out attempting to take deep breaths. The panic settled in as the vomit came out. Staggering to my knees I let out a desperate plead for it all to end letting the tears run freely down my worthless face blinding me, it took a while but I finally caught my breath, the panic attack was ending. I stood up and shakily walked back home, trying to compose myself before entering the house of horrors.

I have to wonder why I was unlucky enough to be born, why was a life wasted on me? Could my parents not be happy with one perfect child instead of one perfect child and one messed up child, why risk it? Why must I live? It was not my choice to live this life. Pain was all I ever felt, pain and helplessness. It is too hard to smile, too painful to laugh, too stupid to try.

I took a deep breath and walked into the house,

"Mia, where have you been?" My mother asked, more like demanded,

"I went for a run." I stated hoping she would let me go and finish my homework. I stand there staring at my mother who is silent I take this as my chance to leave, I walked past my brothers bedroom, his door was closed, my heart picked up. It always scared me when I found his door closed it meant that something had happened which my mother did not want me to see. I felt the tears come back, I put a shaky hand on the door, and twisted it, I slowly pulled the door opened. Blood drained from my face it had happened it was over. Surly my mother knew, I hated how weak she was. I ran to my brothers side letting out a painful breath his blood surrounded my body, I felt no pulse. At the age of seventeen I had not understood the phrase "My heart felt as if it had spilt into two," until now. I sat there next to my dead brother my head and heart were not on the same page, my heart was braking, my head was disagreeing with what my eyes were seeing.

"Mia, time for school." I woke up I was still with my brother, school was she insane I couldn't go to school, not today. My mother walked in and sighed, tears were sliding down her face,

"Mia please, don't make this harder it was not your dad's fault. Please go to school, we will clean this mess up." I held my brothers body as if he was my only life line, perhaps he was, maybe just maybe if I let go I will float away to my happy place. My mother pulled me away, I wanted to scream but I did not, I was a walking zombie.

I was once again running late for the bus. I quickly threw on my shirt, skirt, tights, shoes, jumper and blazer, stuffed my books into my bag, shot out the door, and sprinted as if I were having a shot at the Olympics, I swear if I were racing for a spot in the Olympics not only would I get in they would have awarded me the gold right then and there, and that is saying something. I would have gone faster if it weren't for the bag I had to carry around. I round the corner and I look to my left and see the bus hurtling down that hill like there was no tomorrow. Now I had two options I could make a fool of myself and run to the bus stop and wave my arms around like a lunatic or I could turn right around and go home email my work and go back to sleep. Now some would chose option two but apparently not me. I ran and waved my arms, but it was too late, I sat at the bus stop, wishing I could fly. After awhile it starts to rain and I thought I should go back home before mum gets the call, saying, "Your daughter was not in tutor group where is she?"

I walk up the hill to my home when a car stops on the side of the rode it was my neighbour,

"Hey want a lift to school?"

"Yer, if you don't mind?"

"Nah not at all hop in."

My neighbour was a 22 year old her name was Emma, she was nice to me I could talk to her about everything. She pulled up next to my school, and just in time too, I raced out of the car yelling a quick thank you. I run up the stairs, and turn down to my tutor class, which was of course the last room in the hall. I stumble in, all eyes on me, as if I were on the stage of X factor, there was a very awkward silence, until my teacher said,

"It is lovely for you to join us, now why don't you go outside and wait for me to come and talk to you," I do not know how many times I have heard my teacher say that to me, ah well it is not always my fault. Let me tell you a little bit about my teacher, Miss Miller she is a lovely teacher who loves the lord of the rings. She teaches music and is our year 12 tutor teacher. Miss Miller is young I would say late 20's, early 30's, she has a lovely nature, and all her students seem to love her. However she may be nice but I can always tell when she is mad, and she is mad. I guess I can't blame her it is the second time this week I've been late and it is only Tuesday.

"Mia," startled I look up to see her big blue eyes staring at me, I should really stop zoning out all the time.

"Yes Miss Miller?"

"Why is it so hard for you to come to school on time?"

"Umm, well I ah, I do not know," she raises her eyes at me,

"Really well darling, I think you can stay in with me at lunch and maybe that will help you to know your answer. You are in year 12 you need to be setting an example," if I had a dollar for every time a teacher had said that to me this year I would be rich.

"Are you even listening to me?"

"What oh yer I know I'm sorry,"

"Lunch time my office, and do not even think about not coming, now go you have class now." But wait this day does get worse, I am sitting in English and remembered that I had not sent in my essay yet, well I won't go into detail but I failed that essay.

Lunch time came and I made my way to Miss Millers office, however on the way I tripped over something, I look down and see a ring, It was gold, I thought in my free I will hand it in to the year levels office someone might be looking for it. Lunch was spent in silence, as I tried to hide the tears that were so close to falling, she was waiting for me to come up with an answer, finally I made up a realistic answer,

"All right all right, my alarm clock did not go off I forget to set it at night time, I sleep in." It was the best I could do, I could hardly go and say, "Oh hey, my dad killed my brother and I slept in my brother's blood because my head was not willing to accept the fact that he's gone."

She looked up from her papers, I felt like I was being investigated for murder by the way she was looking at me.

"So how will we fix this problem?"

"Uhh set a reminder in my phone?" I answered unsure of myself,

"Hmm, well get on with it," I stared in shock,

"You want me to use my phone during school hours?"

"Yes, if it means you will be on time tomorrow morning," I set the reminder in my phone,

"You may go. Oh and Mia, if you ever need to talk I am here if you need." Her blue eyes held worry, a tear escaped my eye I quickly turned towards the door and paused,

"Thank you for the offer." And I walked out. I finished the school day in one piece, I got on the bus and remembered that I still had the ring , bugger I forgot to take it back ah well I'll do it tomorrow. I thought.

"How was your day?" My friend Milly asked me, Milly is a tall girl who has short red hair, green eyes, and is rather slim. I sighed not really wanting to talk,

"Hmm year 12 is not easy there is always something going on. How was your day?" We chatted back and forth until it was my time to get off the bus.

I had been playing with the ring the whole bus ride, I felt a connection towards it, I cannot describe it. I decided to try it on, it fitted perfectly. My world began to spin the sensation was over wheeling as everything went dark.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I kept my eyes shut tight as the falling sensation ended, I wonder if anyone will carry me up the hill because I knew I would not be moving any time soon, In-fact I was so exhausted from the day I just had that I thought I felt myself drifting into a pleasant sleep. I was just about to fall into deep sleep when I felt a shadow block my sun. I cursed (in my head) the person who was disturbing my comfort, but then I felt pain, I tried to sit up but strong hands kept me down. I started to feel rather scared; I opened my eyes I could not see much. I turned my head a little to the left and saw, well I'll tell you what I didn't see I did not see the little park that was meant to be near my house and I did not see a road or cars for that matter. My breathing picked up my heart was beating so fast I would not be surprised if the man could hear it. Speaking of the man, was he some sort of kidnapper. Oh shit, am I going to die? Is he going to kill me? I jump up much too fast casing my legs to collapse on me, before hit the ground I felt strong arms grab me from behind.

"Do not struggle, answer my questions and we will not hurt you." That was about the biggest lie I had ever received.

"Who are you?" A tall man with piercing blue eyes commanded, his arrow pointing at me. While the other man held me up.

"Why would I tell you?" I shook my head thinking maybe I had died and this is the afterlife, I mean these people looked medieval.

The man who I still did not know the name to (however there was something familiar about him, but at this current time I feel like I am suffering from a hangover it is that bad, it is blurring my vision), Tightened his grip on my wrists. I winced in pain.

"Answer the question." His voice growled in my ear, I wanted to shiver but I held my ground well tried to at least.

"Am I dead?" I asked hoping it to be true because this was not normal. But then nor was my brothers murder.

"I can assure you we are as real as you and you are most certainly not dead. And if you wish to remain breathing I suggest you start answering our questions." I had nothing they wanted or needed well so I assumed, and with that conclusion I gave them my name.

"My name is Mia, Mia Matthews, where am I? Who are you? And what do you want from me?" I spat out.

"We are currently in the middle of nowhere, who we are is none of your concern. You will travel with us until we deicide your fate." Those blue eyes held distrust and threats.

"Where do you hail from?" I assumed he meant where I was born.

"Australia" with the confused looks I continue, "I live in Sydney," More distrust,

"I have travelled across the lands of Middle Earth and I have never heard of Sydney before. Who are you really?" Growled the voice behind me.

"I have told you, it is not my problem if you choose not to believe me." How could they have not heard of Sydney before. Before I could protest I felt my hands being tied behind my back.

"Attempt to escape I will not hesitate to kill you. Understand?" All I could do was nod dumbly. He walked in front of me his piercing grey eyes stared right into my soul as if he were trying to extract the devil himself from me. Blue eyes handed grey eyes a black cloth and soon I was blinded.

"How do you expect me to walk if I cannot see where it is I am going?" I snapped, fine if these people did not trust me I would not give them a reason. I felt one of them pull at the rope. And we walked, I tripped a few times. I was not in a comfortable or forgiving position. Flashes of my brother haunted my mind. It soon came to my realisation that there were more people around. I did fear for my safety. Soon I was pulled to a stop and was being forced to sit down.

"Now my dear girl. I must know, how it is you ended up in the middle of nowhere?" the voice sounded much older and yet kinder but still firm. I kept silent, not knowing what I should say.

"I see you are injured and I do not see you as a threat. I am Gandalf, and you my dear has somehow managed to find your way into our group. We are resting here for the night, it would serve you well not to get on Aragorn's bad side. He will care for your wounds if you allow him to."

"Will you let me walk free?"

"Well now that will depend on your answers." Suddenly I was able to see again. I looked around the group, it was the strangest looking group I had seen. If it were not for the fact that each of them carried a weapon I would have laughed myself to my grave. Grey eyes who I now knew as Aragorn sat down in front of me. His hands went to my head and I flinched away. He let out a sigh.

"Do not be silly. If I wanted to hurt you I would have do so already." I tried not to flinch again as he made sure my cut on my head from the fall was tended to. Blue eyes who was still unnamed came up holding food. He whispered something to Aragorn, then left. Aragorn handed me what looked like chicken, I took it without the intension of eating it. I had stopped eating a long time ago I was not about to start.

"What is your intension?" I laughed I had none, I looked down only then having noticed I was still wearing my school uniform I was grateful I had worn my jumper, for the knee length, summer dress did not offer much warmth I sent a thanks up to the gods that my school also insisted we wear long socks in summer.

"I have none. Let me tell you something, I woke up this morning I found something which I will never be able to run from. I went to school, and then before I knew it I was being tied up and blind folded. I do not know where I am or who you people are, blue eyes looks different from any human I have seen. You have what I assume to be children out in the middle of no where. Are you kidnapping me, and taking me to some sex trade place so I can produce children? is that what this is?" Aragorn looked shocked as did Gandalf. After they had spent time talking to each other, blue eyes came up to me,

"I am Legolas, you will travel with us, but we mean you no harm. Stand up turn around." Oh yes because I was going to do that,

"I am not stupid, I do not believe your words." Gandalf came next,

"You do not have a choice for some unexplained reason it seems you are meant to join our adventure for now. I believe you are not from this world, and I can only offer my word that no harm will come to you. However if there is no trust on your side you will remain tied up. Now eat girl you look like you are fading away." I threw the plate away and almost at once Legolas had tied me up again. The rope dug sharply into my skin.

"Sleep, tomorrow we walk." Gandalf had left us to it, and it became a stare down. Which I lost and soon I closed my eyes but not my mind fearing my brother's dead body. I felt his eyes watching me, I could not run when he was stronger and faster.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

I woke up with a start, I looked around and noticed nothing had changed. I was still in my uniform, which was now dirty. For some odd reason this annoyed me, it is true I never really liked school, never found my place. I wasn't a nerd, I wasn't sporty, or popular. I was just there floating from group to group, never fitting in. But this uniform was the only thing that made sense at this current point in time. So to see it dirty made me a little sad. I was still in the middle of nowhere with these strange people. I was certain I would wake up in my own bed, but I was wrong. Perhaps that is a good thing for what waited for me at home could be worse than what waited for me here.

'I see you have awoken. Come and eat, it will be a long day for all.' Before I could stand up Aragorn had made his way back to the group, as if one look would kill him. My hands were still tied so it took me a moment to stand up, once I got my balance, I shyly made my way over, wishing the ground would swallow me up. It didn't. I stood behind the children, not knowing what to do I decided to stand there and wait for someone to say something.

'Well lass what are you standing around for. Grab a seat and some food before the Hobbits eat everything in sight.'

'What the hell is a Hobbit?' I asked completely at a loss, everyone looked at me in shock. Legolas got up pulled me away and in a low but threatening voice said,

'Do not speak such foul language. You are walking on dangerous waters.' He dragged me back to the group and sat me down in between himself and Aragorn. I felt like I was back at school.

'Eat.' I raised my eyes,

'My hands seem to be currently unavailable to perform such a task,' Aragorn untied my hands and shoved a plate in my now freed hands. None paid me the slightest attention as I played with my food not knowing how I was going to eat after having not eaten for years without throwing it back up. My body went numb and my mind went blank. Soon they were packing up the camp. I felt my hands being pulled behind my back and tied up again.

'You have not eaten. If it gives you piece of mind we do not poison the food we give to outsiders. I will untie your hands you may eat while we walk.' Panic bubbled over me, and the group moved out. Aragorn walked with me in silence, casting me the occasional look, I thought I would try and pry some much needed information out of him. I mean what's the worst he could do?

'So, Aragorn is it? What an odd name,' I paused waiting to get a reaction, he didn't react he just kept walking, I tried another one.

'So this group, I assume is what, on a trip somewhere. But where is that somewhere exactly? And why does blue eyes have arrows and the short guy with the axe and the rest of you with sharp swords, honestly you could really hurt someone. And you know you are kidnapping me.' Aragorn kept walking but he was looking at me,

'Aye, we are heading somewhere just as everyone else is. We are all heading somewhere it is just a matter of where. None can truly know where we will end up. It is not safe to travel without weapons. I assume you are referring to yourself when you say, we could hurt someone, if that is the case, you need not worry yourself. We will not cause you harm, if you give us no reason too. We simply do not trust you. And you are right about one thing, I suppose we are as you put is so nicely, kidnapping you. Now you have your answers, stop speaking and eat, before you pass out, if that be the case blue eyes will be forced to carry you.' I sighed, and started eating I would get rid of the food later on.

'We will stop and rest for a while,' Aragorn called out, the group slumped down, pulling their bags off. I sat further away from the group again, the apple was not settling well and I knew I couldn't keep it down much longer, how can one get a little alone time around here?

'Umm Aragorn,' he turned sharply at my voice raising his eyebrow at me, 'Um I need a moment alone,' everyone turned to look at me, my face heated up, luckily Aragorn was not stupid and came to my rescue,

'Come you will not wander alone,' we walked for a little while, and we came across some trees, 'Do not try and run, you will not get far,' he whispered dangerously, I nodded and went behind the tree.

'Um Aragorn could you I don't know just move further away please, I won't run away, I have nowhere to run.' I didn't get a response, I closed my eyes trying to figure out how to do this quietly,

'Very well, I will trust you to come back to the camp in a short while, if you have not returned I will find you and you will be sorry,' I ginned as I heard him walk away, just in time too as I vomited everything out. Tears stung my eyes, it was always painful, but not as painful as my memories, I moved to the next tree and held onto it as if it were my life force, I tried to stop the memories but I couldn't, my breath had caught in my throat,

Blood deep red blood stained my pale cold skin. It was not my blood but the blood of my brother. Days could have gone by and I would not have noticed. A call from the distance brought me out of my shock. My eyes glittered with un-shed tears, another call much closer this time. It had to be my brother coming for me, it just had to be. Hope found itself to me again and I clung to it, I would not let him go that easily. My feet moved on their own, every part of my body tingled with hope. My eyes met those angry green eyes, the eyes of my father; I felt the glass wall which had been created inside of me explode into millions of sharp glass. Not even the air outside could stop me from feeling as if I was being pushed under water. A voice called my name but it was a softer voice one that held love, and compassion,

'Mia,' I looked up and saw soft grey eyes looking at me, Aragorn, he knelt down, and frowned, he felt my forehead,

'You are warm, why did you not say you were unwell, I heard you being sick.' He put one arm on my back and the other under my legs and lifted me as if I were a feather.

'You are very light for your height, your mind is troubled, you need rest and healing.'


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

'Legolas,' Aragorn firmly called out, 'get me some hot water, a wash cloth and Sam could you make a hot tea with the herbs you made for Frodo.' Aragorn said not taking his away from mine. I looked away, not wanting to know what he was thinking. I wanted to sleep, yes that's what I wanted, I wanted sleep, I wanted the earth to pull me under so I never had to breathe again,

'Mia, I need to know where you are hurt,' Aragorn had pulled me out of my wishful thinking, I sighed as Legolas passed a bowl of hot water. Aragorn poured into the bowl and with gentle hands started washing my face. I suddenly felt unusually calm, and yet more awake and more tried. How was that even possible?

'I'm fine, uh when I get nervous or scared I tend to throw up.' I replied shakily, trying to push Aragorn's hands away, Legolas noticed this and held my hands down,

'We are trying to help, stop fussing, unless you want me to tie you up again,' I laughed,

'Considering that you will tie me up at some point again, your threat does not bother me,' he growled and roughly sat me up pulling my hands once again behind me and tied them up. I sighed, wishing I had my phone on me. I was tired of all this walking, and tired of being treated like some serial killer,

'Ok fine, I am, I promise I won't do anything, could you please stop treating me like I'm the one who started world war 2 because I wasn't even alive, and I don't plan on starting a war. Look I don't know who you guys are or what you are doing, and quite frankly I do not care, I want my brother,' I sighed in utter frustration, as the group all looked at me like I had two heads, none said anything, though the smallest one started to say something but someone hushed him before he could say anything. I gave up, would someone please shoot me, I thought as I started internally panicking. I didn't make eye contact with Aragorn as he swiftly put something in a drink and held it to my lips,

'Drink, it should settle your stomach,' I closed my mouth tightly, phft more like kill me,

'Listen, and listen well, if I or anyone else wanted to kill you, believe me when I say you would be dead already. Stop being stubborn, daylight is still upon us and we must reach the snowy mountain before the week closes, we have a half day hike upon us,' I accepted Aragorn's drink, and we were soon walking again. The drink after but a little while, had started to take effect, and I was feeling a whole lot better. But my feet disagreed, I could feel a few blisters forming. Not surprised really, my school shoes were not cut out for a lovely hike, I thought to myself. But what I had nothing else to ware, I thank the gods I wore my mini black bike shorts under my dress that day,

'I'm Pippin and this is Merry,' startled I looked down and found the boys, no, Hobbits, walking next to me. I smiled down at them,

'I'm Mia, nice to see a friendly face for once.'

'Mia, what a nice name, your rather pretty did you know that? But your dress is a funny colour and you ware odd shoes,' Pippin exclaimed as Merry slapped him over the head. I laughed lightly,

'Yes I suppose this dress is a little odd, my jumper at least somewhat goes with it. As for my shoes well they are just part of what I have to ware.' They both looked a little confused but didn't pester more on my outfit, but rather went on talking about their home to me. It was clear that they missed it and their love for their home blew me away.

I wished for a home I could be proud of. Don't get me wrong Australia is amazing, I love it, it is home, and I am proud to be living in the safest, chilled out country. However the family I have scared me to no end. No correction, my dad scared me to no end. He was forceful, and rude, and he killed my brother. The one person who I loved and felt safe around, gone, just like that.

I scolded myself, knowing that when I was alone I would mourn over my loss. Or maybe I wouldn't I was scared that once I start crying I would not be able to stop. I shut my brain of and continued listening to the two Hobbits next to me, yes they were a nice distraction. After a few hours I felt myself lagging behind, Legolas just continued pulled on the ropes. My feet had entered a whole new world of pain, I grit my teeth and kept going with tears blinding me. I wished they would just leave me to my fate, but I was pretty unlucky. Legolas must have felt my pace slow down for he turned and swiftly walked up to me. Without saying a word he swiftly picked me up threw me over his shoulder and kept walking. I protested for a while but I was too tried and my feet were killing me and I soon gave in. I thought I would try and pry some well needed information out of him. I had nothing else to do, so with a sigh I said in my sweetest voice,

'Can we please have a chat?' he was silent for a moment, then I felt him shifting me soon I was standing up again I bit my lip trying to hold out from crying, he untied my hands and picked me up again but this time bride like style, he walked on in silence, waiting for me to speak again, I blushed knowing what I really wanted to ask, and hoped he would answer

'Uh well, I was wondering why you and er the um others seem to um hate me so much,' I looked down at my now freed hands, I wondered if he had heard me, I was about to ask again but he stopped me,

'Look at me,' I really did not want to but he stayed silent, I slowly looked up into his crystal blue eyes, those eyes took my breath away, I almost forgot to breathe. He nodded,

'Heed my words, young one, trust will take time to build, but we do not hate you. These are dark times, we must be careful. If this were another Age, you would be most welcomed, but we have no idea where you are from, or why you are here. Hate no, not unless you give us reason to. Distrust yes, but more so we are being cautious.' He gave me a small smile before adding, 'Was there something else that plagues your young mind that you wish to discuss?'

'Apart from, what is happening and who you people really are and what you are running from, then no.'

'Over time you will learn who we are. I believe you know of the Shire, thanks to our Hobbit friends, what of elves do you know?' Elves? I frowned,

'They are but a myth, more so part of a story they are not real.'

'I must sadly inform you that they are real. I am an Elf, Legolas of the Woodland Realm. Gimli is the dwarf, and Gandlaf is a wizard.' If I had been walking I would have fallen over,

'No, no, that's crazy, this is crazy, and that type of stuff is not real. How is this even possible?' I felt my breathing become faster, I started panicking, and they were scared of me, why? I was nothing but a human, I think. I have no clue, all I knew was that I felt my body shake,

'All will be well mellon, sleep now, it has been a long day for us all, we are close to where Aragorn intends to camp.'

I woke up, and found myself on the ground with a blanket on me. I sat up and instantly Aragorn was by my side, pulling me up and out of sight. Had I missed something?

A cry of angry birds flew overhead, after a few more moments I was dragged out,

'What was that?' I asked, slightly out of breath,

'Spies of Saruman. Our passage is being watched we must move quickly, we have no time to spare. our road leads up the snowy mountain.' I looked up and thought, oh for the love of all things good in this world dont make me climb a fucken mountain of snow.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

White, that was all I saw, never in my life had I seen snow, at first I was over joyed and I really wanted to make a snowman. But unfortunately these guys were on some mission and paid little attention to my needs well more so my wants. For since the day Aragorn found me puking, he had kept a close eye on me making sure I drank water and ate. Tears would sting my eyes as I nibbled at my food, for someone as worthless and ugly as me did not deserve food. I shivered hugging my body close to me as snow fell faster from the sky.

We had started to walk up this cold unforgiving mountain, I liked to think I get some bonus points for doing this trek in a dress. The Hobbits looked no better than I felt, I took comfort knowing I was not going through this on my own. Legolas seemed to glide across the snow, this made me jealous, but to his credit he stayed close to me, making sure I wouldn't fall. Apparently they hadn't thought one of the Hobbits would fall, hah, I was over the moon that this time it was not me. I turned to the fallen Hobbit and held out one of my cold hands, he took my hand and I pulled him up, his other hand went straight to his neck. His eyes became wide and his hand shook in mine,

'Boromir, give the ring to Frodo,' Aragorn called out in a commanding voice, if Frodo hadn't looked so worried I would have laughed. But as the man, who I now knew as Boromir, walked up to Frodo with the ring dangling in front of him, I heard something a weird voice; for that moment I could not help but stare at the perfect gold ring. I quickly let go of Frodo and walked away. What was happening to me, now I'm hearing voices, voices that threatened me no less.

Legolas placed a hand on my shoulder and pushed me out of view from the ring, Frodo soon had it covered up. Aragorn seemed to relax a bit more. We moved on, the steep climb was hurting my legs, my feet, and my brain. Yes my brain, I think I'm getting a brain freeze. Omg what if my fingers get frostbite. All of a sudden I started freaking out at the possibility of frostbite, my brothers voice echoed inside my head, telling me what to do if someone got frostbite. And how it was one thing we Australian's needed not worry about. That was for my year eight essay, he was getting frustrated, we had to share the computer, and he being in year 11 needed to do his work; so he helped me with mine to get it done faster. My heart ached for my older brother's: hugs, teasing, advice, comfort and his weird sense of humour. Yes it is true part of me had died the day I walked into his room and saw his body.

I did not think it were possible to become any colder but alas I was wrong. At this stage I was offered a cloak, by which I pulled on gladly. It offered me some warmth, but not enough, for me to stop shivering,

'There is a voice in the air,'

'God and I thought I was the crazy one hearing voices and all, I guess I should be happy I'm not the only one,' I stuttered out, and received a glare from all but the wizard, who called out, claiming it was Saruman. Before I knew what was happening, a hard blanket of snow drowned us all. I lost the use of my arms and legs, they had finally reached a point where I could no longer feel them. I gaged on the snow, panic had settled in, and I full out started crying. I could not help it, I was terrified that I was being buried alive. A light appeared above my head I felt fresh air slowly make its way into my lungs. I was pulled up by someone, coughing and splattering. But what terrified me the most was the lack of movement from my body, I couldn't help but let out a panicked whimper,

'Gandalf, we must turn back, this will be the death of the Hobbits and Mia,' someone yelled out, all sense of what was happening around me was lost, for fear had overcame my mind.

'Mia, hold onto me, you are in no shape to walk,' I don't remember if I answered or not but soon I was being carried down the mountain, as were the Hobbits,

'I can't feel my hands,' I started sobbing, 'I'm so tired,'

'Shhh, I know, but you must stay awake, once we have shelter, Aragorn shall attend to you,' the voice was clam, and soon he was singing softly, my cries soon turned to small sobs.

'I'm going to lay you down now ok,' I nodded tiredly, and closed my eyes, 'No not yet,' said the same voice.

'Legolas, Boromir I need to undress Mia from her wet clothing, and slowly warm her up, could you both attend to the Hobbits, make sure they have full function of their legs, and arms. Also Legolas can I have your cloak?'

'No, leave me alone, don't need you,' I said, who knows what he would see once he undressed me, I knew it would be ghastly, for I had not taken care of myself,

'Hush Mia, you have no say in this,' his hands worked quickly, undoing my dress and pulling it over my body, for a moment he observed but quickly placed a cloak around my body. I wanted more than that, I wanted blankets,

'So, so, cold,'

'Shh I know, I need you to trust me, I am a healer and I have seen men die from frostbite. I do not want to scare you, I want you to know that I know what I am doing.' At this point I really did not care I wanted to sleep. I shut my eyes,

'This will be painful, and for that I am sorry,' as soon as my fingers hit the water I screamed in pain and tried to pull away, but Aragorn was strong, he muttered words of what I assumed to be for my comfort. But it did no good as I cried, soon Legolas came over and placed my head on his lap, and started massaging my hair. Tears fell freely from my eyes, but even more so when Aragorn pulled of my shoes and started rubbing heat back into them, I tried to keep my hands in the water but couldn't, as soon as I took them out I felt my hands turn to fire, Legolas lightly reprimanded me as he reached over and placed them back into the I'm guessing warm water, this time rubbing my arms gently so I had no choice but to keep my hands in the water. My feet were fine thanks to my socks, but they were still painfully cold. I tried to pull away but Aragorn kept on rubbing the warmth back into my feet. My eyes closed, no one said anything so I let my mind go to that dark place inside of me, where I could allow myself some rest.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Maybe I'm just crazy, yes I am crazy, I'm a fool, I am a socially awkward human, where I spend half my life questioning everything. Why? is a powerful word. Why do some people believe in God and others do not? Why do some people never cry? Why are humans on this earth? Is there something greater out there in the universe that we as humans are yet to discover? Well if those sound like big questions try this one WHY THE F*** am I going through the experience of frostbite I live in Australia where it's 40 degrees every day. Ok not every day it does get cold in winter but none of this – 10 degrees crap. Why was I here in fake land with these weirdos? I feel weird around them, no I feel embarrassed. I do not fit in. I must be dead yes that's what has happened I have died and now I am going through a test before I am allowed into Heaven. And the reason why I feel pain is because I have yet to make it into Heaven. I felt someone move behind me, I closed my eyes wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep,

'I know you are awake, how do you feel?'

'Am I dead?' I muttered to the voice,

'No you are very much alive. Are you still in any pain? Sam and Merry will be finished with the tea shortly. You will drink it and you should no longer feel the effect of the cold from the last few days. Now we have a few moments to talk while Gandalf tries to open the door to Moria.'

I looked around and found Gandalf looking livid at the door, if I was feeling myself I would have laughed and told him to knock and if someone was home they would answer if not move on try again another day. But Sam pulled me out of this thought by handing me a warm cup with tea in it. I must admit I'm not a fan but I would give it a go. Aragorn sat in silence, watching me. I took a sip, it was very warm and sweet almost sickly sweet. This is why I don't drink tea without milk it does not taste very nice. Ah well when Aragorn goes I'll quickly throw it in the lake. As if reading my mind Aragorn said,

'Think about throwing that out and I will simply make more and I will give it to you myself.' With one last threatening look I took one long sip and drowned the tea. Aragorn held his hand out I assumed he wanted the cup. He took it and looked,

'You have left some' he said handing it back, I closed my eyes and quickly drank the last few drops. He took the cup and put it down nodding.

'I want to ask you a question, if you will allow me to do so.' I nodded not seeing why he would ask permission to ask me stuff.

'Wait I want some answers as well, will you answer my questions?' I added quickly before he could speak. There was something about Aragorn that made me feel safe, although he scares me at times he is also gentle and he had yet to hurt me.

'I will do my best to answer your questions. Firstly I want to know why you do not eat,' I closed my eyes and sighed, wishing he would start off with the basics, like what's your favourite colour.

'Wow you don't hold back do you. And I do eat, just not that much. I don't need to. Where am I?' he studied me for a moment before answering,

'You are in Middle Earth, currently we are outside the mines of Moria home to the dwarfs. Why don't you need to eat much?'

'Because I can't. What is your destination?'

'I need more of an answer from you before I answer.' We sat staring at each other. His eyes bore straight into mine, I felt like he could extract the devil himself from the intense look he was giving me. But it was not a look of hatred or a look of annoyance but rather concern. I turned my back on him unable to hold his gaze.

'I can't do this I'm sorry I'm not worth your time nor your concern. I am nothing, I wish you had left me alone to die.' I let out a small sob and held my legs up to my chest burying my head in my arms as shameful tears flooded my eyes. Arms wrapped around my shaking body, Aragorn was talking but not in a language I recognised, but it had a calming effect. I looked up at him and still only concern flooded his eyes. It broke my heart to know I was making someone concerned about me. But looking at him I was overcome with such grief and emotion that I briefly explained it,

'I don't eat because I don't deserve to eat. It helps me get through my day, punishing myself it makes it easier to deal with everything. I'm so disgusting and so broken, I don't even know what to say. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry someone as worthless as me does not deserve your concern.' I buried my head in my hands and cried freely,

'Look at me,' I didn't move, I couldn't. I felt hands pry mine away from my face. Aragon held my hands gently, I closed my eyes wanting to escape in the dark corner of the world.

'Look at me, open your eyes.'

'I can't, you must hate me like everyone else does.'

'I do not hate you.' I could feel his eyes on me, I knew he was hoping that if he looked at me long enough I would give in. He was right. I opened my wet eyes, but I felt ashamed. He grabbed my chin in his hand before I could look away. My heart started beating faster and faster, I felt like I was going to be sick.

'I care about you. I do not wish to see one so young deal with such grief. I know not where you got the idea that you do not deserve to eat, but while you are with me you will eat. You are worth fighting for. You need to be honest with me from now on. And in return I will be honest with you.' Tears fell from my eyes as he pulled me into a hug which I accepted this time. The sound of splashing pulled us apart and Aragorn looked quickly around and shot up grabbing Pippin.

'Do not disturb the water,' I looked around quickly drying my eyes and feeling a little lighter then I had before, I saw Frodo stand up and say something and then the doors opened. I felt someone guide me towards the door, I looked around and saw Aragorn who smiled slightly at me. We walked through the door,

'Do not look down, trust me.' Aragorn whispered in my ear. Now when someone says don't do something my instant reaction is to do what I've been told not to do. But this time I looked straight in front of me not wanting to know what was below my feet,

'This is no mine it's a tomb. We should leave now.' Before I could register what was happening Sam yelled out,

'Aragorn, Aragorn help,' Legolas flew past with Aragon right behind. Legolas was gracefully shooting arrows at a sea monster while Aragorn hacked at it. I squirmed it was the most horrid and scary looking thing I had seen. The monster dropped Frodo into the waiting arms of Boromir. Aragorn quickly ushered the four Hobbits and myself back into the cave no wait tomb. All went pitch black. Luckily I was not so scared of the dark, but I knew the horrors that could plague my mind if it is dark and that was what scared me.

'It is a four day journey until we reach the exit. Come let us hope we go unnoticed.' Gandalf said and his staff light up creating a slight light for us to follow.


End file.
